Sunday, December 10, 2006
LIFE - Mind Of A Mankind - Chapter Eleven
MISCELLANEOUS MATTERS
"Its not you who will decide whether you remain as my husband or not.
Its my decision!"
Margarita's anger (Jatinegara, South Jakarta, 1993)
I have to be honest with you. After I had heard the description from Natalia about Margarita's appearance, my feeling and desire for Margarita was in decadence. About Margarita's manner of eating food, before Natalia told me about it, I had already noticed it but I had just disregarded it, thinking that it was normal for a spirit to eat in that manner. After Natalia had informed me I assumed that Margarita had refused to meet me in my dream because her appearance was ugly and fat. I had visualised Margarita in my mind as a young, sexy and beautiful being. I felt uneasy and so each time when Yani was going into altered state of mind without her realising it, I would make her fully awake again and again to prevent Margarita from meeting me. Yani who was oblivious to what was happening to her, was annoyed with my action for making her always startled. When I asked her what she was thinking about, she just said that she was actually thinking of nothing. It was just like staring or observing an object without thinking about anything. And while I was startling Yani to bring back her to the real world, Margarita was angry with me. When she managed to meet me, she already knew my feelings for her by then.
I expressed to Margarita that we had made a mistake by 'marrying' and "It is not possible for a mermaid to live on land with a man and it is not possible for a man to live with a mermaid under the sea." I suggested to her for us to call it off and besides, her parents did not know about the 'marriage'. She was angry with me and she stared at me. She told me that she would be the one who would decide whether I remained as her 'husband' or not. She queried me about my feelings for Yani and I could sense that she was jealous. She frightened me by performing and demonstrating her anger and character like a devil by muttering, "I want blood. I want your blood." For a moment there I thought she was really a demon and I had been rused by the demon herself. I reasoned it as only an illustration from her that she could become an angel or a demon. Then we talked again.
That afternoon after we had discussed about our relationship matters, just before she left Yani's body, Margarita had pinched very hard on Yani's left hand until it turned very red and later there was a blue-black mark. When Yani's personality came back on again, she complained about the painful swelling on her left hand. She had wondered how that swelling had happened and I did not tell her anything about Margarita or about the caused of her swelling on her left hand. Why would Yani pinched herself on her left hand until it swollen if Yani was impersonating as Margarita? Nevertheless, Margarita always met up with me and we did not talk about it anymore. I had put the matter aside and we remained as it was.
This incidence proved my insincerity towards Margarita too and I knew I had hurt her feelings. Later when I came back to Singapore, when I reviewed my life in Indonesia, I felt like a bastard for treating her that way, though she was a soul or spirit from another dimension or spiritual world. I promised myself that if ever I managed to meet Margarita again, I would apologise to her about my past actions upon her. She really loved me. I knew because I felt her loves for me.
I asked Margarita about the discotheques in her world too and how different it was when compared to the discotheques that were present in the physical world. She answered that it was much better in the world of physical. I asked her "Why?". She said there was a difference in feeling thrilled and happy. That was the reason she loved to go for discotheques in the physical world rather than within her own world.
I asked Margarita about us making love in my dream instead of through Yani's body. She replied that the feelings would not be the same as when she made love through possession of Yani's body. I queried her further, "Why?" She could not answer me definitely. She sort of like saying to me that it was not the same over and over again. I could not understand her explanation. Back then, I did not know much about the meaning about the soul and the physical body. If she had explained to me back then, I would be confuse with her explanations perhaps.
I asked Margarita about whether they could eat the foods from the world of physical without possessing a human body. She told me they could. I asked her how would I know whether spirits from her world had eaten the food or not. She said that the food would taste differently. It would be tasteless. Well, this answer was not surprising for me for I had heard about it too from the Taoists who would offer foods for their decease ancestors and the hungry ghosts from the unseen realm for them to eat during the Hungry Ghosts Month Festival. They mentioned that the food would be tasteless when you eat those food offerings to the dead.
I asked Margarita whether Michael Jackson was famous in her world. She said that Michael Jackson was very famous in their world too. In fact everyone in her world knew Michael Jackson and loved Michael Jackson so much. I was surprised to hear that. And I asked her whether there were Michael Jackson's cassette tapes and compact discs in her world. She said they had them in her world too. So I asked her how they managed to procure it and who produced them. She did not know how they managed to have it and how they produced it. She could not give me a definite answer. I just let it go.
These were all the questions I had put forward to Margarita and back then I was so ignorant of many things, especially, matters related to the spirit world. I only thought about it seriously after I had returned to Singapore and I did my researched about them. I discovered many new things that I did not know about in the past. Perhaps these questions would help you in your researched work in your own belief about them.
Natalia told me that Mas Anton took care of her well. They lived in one of the rooms in the church opposite the hotel. They did not own many belongings in their room. Some kitchen and cooking utensils plus a mattress for them to sleep. They did not have many clothings. They were poor spirits. She would make for him coffee and somethimes she would cook for him. They always ate together. She was just waiting for the day when Mas Anton would have enough cash for a new life together. Anton had told her that he loved her and not to worry about anything. He had promised her that they would be 'married' and once he had enough money, he would buy a house to live in and he would buy all the good things for her and for their house. Is heaven and hell like earth? Where there are materials like on earth?
There was a book titled "Berdialog Dengan Djinn" or Dialog With Djinn, it was written in 'Bahasa Indonesia' or Indonesian National Language, translated by an Indonesian man. It was originally written in Arabic and later translated into 'Bahasa Indonesia". The story was from the middle east region. Sorry, I could not recall his name. I read this book when I was in imprisonment.
He mentioned that the world of the Djinns and the world of mankind are similar. The Djinns have all the things we humans have in the physical world and whatever professions that we humans have in the physical world, they, The Djinns, from the world of the unseen, have it too. If you asked any religious Muslims, they would agree with the "Berdialog Dengan Djinn" author. In this book, it mentioned that the world famous magician David Copperfield, the Non-Muslim Djinns had 'signed' an agreement with him and there was a newly converted Muslim Djinn that had mentioned that he would try his best to destroy David Copperfield's Non-Muslim Djinns. Interesting to read but many of the things that were mentioned in that book, were based upon Islamic Faith belief of the Djinns and their world.
When I read the book 'Immortality' written and compiled by the late Ian Curry, there was a chapter in that book whereby the soul entities from the unseen realm mentioned that they have all those professions that we humans have on earth. They too have all the materials that we humans have on earth too and they have activities like on earth too, for instance, golf, drinking and etc. The interesting part was that they mentioned it was free. And I was not surprised but my inmate friends (a Buddhists and a Christian) were and they just stared at me after reading Ian Curry book. I had mentioned to them about the spirits that I had met while I was living in Indonesia and what they had told me. Most of time I would compare the information written by famous authors with the direct experiences and informations that I had while living in Indonesia. It actually helped me to understand about the physical world and the spirit world more and better.
"Its not you who will decide whether you remain as my husband or not.
Its my decision!"
Margarita's anger (Jatinegara, South Jakarta, 1993)
I have to be honest with you. After I had heard the description from Natalia about Margarita's appearance, my feeling and desire for Margarita was in decadence. About Margarita's manner of eating food, before Natalia told me about it, I had already noticed it but I had just disregarded it, thinking that it was normal for a spirit to eat in that manner. After Natalia had informed me I assumed that Margarita had refused to meet me in my dream because her appearance was ugly and fat. I had visualised Margarita in my mind as a young, sexy and beautiful being. I felt uneasy and so each time when Yani was going into altered state of mind without her realising it, I would make her fully awake again and again to prevent Margarita from meeting me. Yani who was oblivious to what was happening to her, was annoyed with my action for making her always startled. When I asked her what she was thinking about, she just said that she was actually thinking of nothing. It was just like staring or observing an object without thinking about anything. And while I was startling Yani to bring back her to the real world, Margarita was angry with me. When she managed to meet me, she already knew my feelings for her by then.
I expressed to Margarita that we had made a mistake by 'marrying' and "It is not possible for a mermaid to live on land with a man and it is not possible for a man to live with a mermaid under the sea." I suggested to her for us to call it off and besides, her parents did not know about the 'marriage'. She was angry with me and she stared at me. She told me that she would be the one who would decide whether I remained as her 'husband' or not. She queried me about my feelings for Yani and I could sense that she was jealous. She frightened me by performing and demonstrating her anger and character like a devil by muttering, "I want blood. I want your blood." For a moment there I thought she was really a demon and I had been rused by the demon herself. I reasoned it as only an illustration from her that she could become an angel or a demon. Then we talked again.
That afternoon after we had discussed about our relationship matters, just before she left Yani's body, Margarita had pinched very hard on Yani's left hand until it turned very red and later there was a blue-black mark. When Yani's personality came back on again, she complained about the painful swelling on her left hand. She had wondered how that swelling had happened and I did not tell her anything about Margarita or about the caused of her swelling on her left hand. Why would Yani pinched herself on her left hand until it swollen if Yani was impersonating as Margarita? Nevertheless, Margarita always met up with me and we did not talk about it anymore. I had put the matter aside and we remained as it was.
This incidence proved my insincerity towards Margarita too and I knew I had hurt her feelings. Later when I came back to Singapore, when I reviewed my life in Indonesia, I felt like a bastard for treating her that way, though she was a soul or spirit from another dimension or spiritual world. I promised myself that if ever I managed to meet Margarita again, I would apologise to her about my past actions upon her. She really loved me. I knew because I felt her loves for me.
I asked Margarita about the discotheques in her world too and how different it was when compared to the discotheques that were present in the physical world. She answered that it was much better in the world of physical. I asked her "Why?". She said there was a difference in feeling thrilled and happy. That was the reason she loved to go for discotheques in the physical world rather than within her own world.
I asked Margarita about us making love in my dream instead of through Yani's body. She replied that the feelings would not be the same as when she made love through possession of Yani's body. I queried her further, "Why?" She could not answer me definitely. She sort of like saying to me that it was not the same over and over again. I could not understand her explanation. Back then, I did not know much about the meaning about the soul and the physical body. If she had explained to me back then, I would be confuse with her explanations perhaps.
I asked Margarita about whether they could eat the foods from the world of physical without possessing a human body. She told me they could. I asked her how would I know whether spirits from her world had eaten the food or not. She said that the food would taste differently. It would be tasteless. Well, this answer was not surprising for me for I had heard about it too from the Taoists who would offer foods for their decease ancestors and the hungry ghosts from the unseen realm for them to eat during the Hungry Ghosts Month Festival. They mentioned that the food would be tasteless when you eat those food offerings to the dead.
I asked Margarita whether Michael Jackson was famous in her world. She said that Michael Jackson was very famous in their world too. In fact everyone in her world knew Michael Jackson and loved Michael Jackson so much. I was surprised to hear that. And I asked her whether there were Michael Jackson's cassette tapes and compact discs in her world. She said they had them in her world too. So I asked her how they managed to procure it and who produced them. She did not know how they managed to have it and how they produced it. She could not give me a definite answer. I just let it go.
These were all the questions I had put forward to Margarita and back then I was so ignorant of many things, especially, matters related to the spirit world. I only thought about it seriously after I had returned to Singapore and I did my researched about them. I discovered many new things that I did not know about in the past. Perhaps these questions would help you in your researched work in your own belief about them.
Natalia told me that Mas Anton took care of her well. They lived in one of the rooms in the church opposite the hotel. They did not own many belongings in their room. Some kitchen and cooking utensils plus a mattress for them to sleep. They did not have many clothings. They were poor spirits. She would make for him coffee and somethimes she would cook for him. They always ate together. She was just waiting for the day when Mas Anton would have enough cash for a new life together. Anton had told her that he loved her and not to worry about anything. He had promised her that they would be 'married' and once he had enough money, he would buy a house to live in and he would buy all the good things for her and for their house. Is heaven and hell like earth? Where there are materials like on earth?
There was a book titled "Berdialog Dengan Djinn" or Dialog With Djinn, it was written in 'Bahasa Indonesia' or Indonesian National Language, translated by an Indonesian man. It was originally written in Arabic and later translated into 'Bahasa Indonesia". The story was from the middle east region. Sorry, I could not recall his name. I read this book when I was in imprisonment.
He mentioned that the world of the Djinns and the world of mankind are similar. The Djinns have all the things we humans have in the physical world and whatever professions that we humans have in the physical world, they, The Djinns, from the world of the unseen, have it too. If you asked any religious Muslims, they would agree with the "Berdialog Dengan Djinn" author. In this book, it mentioned that the world famous magician David Copperfield, the Non-Muslim Djinns had 'signed' an agreement with him and there was a newly converted Muslim Djinn that had mentioned that he would try his best to destroy David Copperfield's Non-Muslim Djinns. Interesting to read but many of the things that were mentioned in that book, were based upon Islamic Faith belief of the Djinns and their world.
When I read the book 'Immortality' written and compiled by the late Ian Curry, there was a chapter in that book whereby the soul entities from the unseen realm mentioned that they have all those professions that we humans have on earth. They too have all the materials that we humans have on earth too and they have activities like on earth too, for instance, golf, drinking and etc. The interesting part was that they mentioned it was free. And I was not surprised but my inmate friends (a Buddhists and a Christian) were and they just stared at me after reading Ian Curry book. I had mentioned to them about the spirits that I had met while I was living in Indonesia and what they had told me. Most of time I would compare the information written by famous authors with the direct experiences and informations that I had while living in Indonesia. It actually helped me to understand about the physical world and the spirit world more and better.
# posted by Zulkifli @ 3:54 AM 
